Birth Coach

 

It's been a good long time since my favorite farmer was a birth coach ... at least, of the human variety.

 

Though my farmer is patient, kind and loving, I'm not sure I would give him an A+ as a birth coach. Randy was one of several farmers at our classes before Jill's birth. We wives heard our fair share of calving jokes. 

 

"We'll just get the chains out," they'd chortle as we puffed our way through class. 

 

The guys thought they were hilarious. The wives? Not so much.

And, during a very long labor, I seem to remember him paying more attention to a Monday night football game than me. 

But maybe he'd get better birth coach reviews from No. 911. Her birthing coach was all inclusive with her "contract" for room, board and plenty of food. 

 

No. 911 also got her own personal birth photographer. It's all the rage these days. Goodness knows, I didn't want video cameras or even still cameras documenting the birth of my offspring until the action was over. And even then, I let the Lamaze coach, the Big Sister and the guest of honor be the focus of the star's first-ever photo shoot.

 

But, No. 911 didn't read the fine print: The Chief County Line Correspondent has the exclusive rights to photograph and write the birth story. 

The heifers - including No. 911 - are in a corral to the east of our house. That makes it easier for Randy to check them more frequently and gives us easy access to the calving shed. Because they are first-time mothers, Randy checks the heifers throughout the day and night, just in case one is having difficulty.

With the heifers, Randy uses a bull for "calving ease" - a bull whose progeny is lower birth weight but which gains well after birth. Most of the time, the heifers calve naturally, but, once in awhile, they need a little help. This year, No. 911 is the only one who's needed an assist so far.

No. 911 calf's hooves had been showing for awhile, and after an hour, Randy didn't see any further progression. We ran her into the calving shed to pull the calf, something we do to help both the mama and the baby.

Usually, we get the heifer into a head gate, my "Christmas" gift of 2010. Sometimes cows can be riled up with the birthing process, so having them contained in the head gate is a much safer option for both mama and people. 

But this time, the heifer wouldn't get up, so Randy had to do some problem solving. 

Randy first splashed disinfectant on the heifer to try to keep the birthing canal as clean as possible. (We've been using the same Tupperware bucket for this job since Randy's folks were in the cow-calf business. It was part of our inheritance.) 

Just like on Grey's Anatomy or Chicago Med, Randy gloved up for the procedure. He tied a chain above the ankle on each of the front hooves of the calf.

 

Then he tied the two chains together.

Her location also didn't allow for enough space to use the pulley system we usually use to help extract the calf. This was the first time in nearly 40 years that I saw Randy just use his own two hands and some brute strength for the job.

Yes, he said he'd be sore the next day.

I theorized that the mother might be as well. (But she stayed calm, much to our relief.)

It's a little scary when calves first arrive, especially when you know they've had a tumultuous and long journey. Randy removed the film over the calf's mouth, and I watched it take a breath. (Sigh of relief from us, too!)

The calf's tongue was swollen from being in the birth canal for awhile.

 

While the mother looked at the baby, she still didn't seem interested in getting up. So we left them for a little alone time, hoping the two would bond away from prying eyes.

 

Another trip to the barn an hour later revealed that all was well.

The two were getting to know each other. Mama gets the job of cleaning off the baby by licking it. It's part of the bonding process for the pair.

In 2012, I wrote "The Miracle of Birth," which showed photos of pulling a baby calf in the head gate. Click here to read that post and see the photos. 

 

Yesterday, the calf was soaking in the unseasonably warm weather when she was reunited with her birth coach. (The mom was loitering nearby, too, but was more interested in eating than being with her baby at that moment.)

The heifer calving is nearing completion, with 17 of the 22 already calved. The cows - which are located in three different locations - are just beginning. 

We've had to contend with some mud in the lots after about an inch of rain last weekend. Thankfully, this first mama to calve at Peace Creek found the straw that Randy spread out for bedding. The feed truck driver maneuvered around the pair so the baby could stay on dry ground.

The second mama had her baby out in pasture grasses. It looked like a smart, dry choice, too.  However, ready or not, here comes a frigid weekend - not the ideal environment for baby calves. On Randy's to-do list? Spreading more straw. 

We'll see if any of the babies born this weekend will need a trip to the sauna and spa - a warm-up in the pickup cab. It's also in the birth contract if needed.