Workout Buddy

All the fitness experts say that companionship while exercising is a good motivator. Ralph is my usual workout buddy. However, he doesn't help me much in the motivation department. Come to think about it, as he gets older, he's becoming a bad influence. He often opts to sleep under the bush in the front yard until I get back.

Once in awhile, Randy is my workout buddy. He does marginally better at communicating while we walk. He also does a better job at actually staying with me instead of running off to explore jackrabbits, water holes and other distractions. I do, however, walk at a pretty brisk pace, so I'm sometimes the one who has a tendency to go off and leave him if I'm not careful.

My other workout buddy is Leslie. I think I can call her Leslie instead of Ms. Sansone because I have five - yes, five - of her workout DVDs.

Jill purchased my first couple of Leslie Sansone "Walk at Home" DVDs when I complained that my 4 mile-a-day walking habit wasn't producing any further weight loss results. I'm sorry, but I think an hour of exercise a day ought to continue yielding measurable results. But that's just me, I guess.

My personal dietitian - also known as my daughter - said I needed to switch things up a bit. My body was getting used to walking 24 miles a week. (I take Sundays off.)

She talked to some dietitian friends who recommended the Leslie Sansone "Walk at Home" tapes for women of a certain age. Yes, I am of that "certain age."

Another important consideration for my friend Leslie's tapes? She uses four basic steps: power walking, side steps, kicks and knee lifts with a few minor variations thrown in.

While I have some gifts for music, I am not gifted as a dancer. Just ask my college voice instructor. She had her son's girlfriend attempt to give me a crash course in show choir choreography so I could try out for K-State Singers back in the day.

It was an unmitigated disaster. She tried valiantly. I was pathetic. I passed the vocal audition easily. The dancing was a different story entirely.

I always contend that K-State Concert Choir was a better fit for me anyway. No dancing was required.

So my aptitude for complicated dance moves is slim to none. But Leslie and I get along just fine.

After awhile of working out with Leslie, I decided I needed a little variety in my workout life. Through my additional purchases, I have to believe I am contributing to her considerable budget for hairspray and cute workout clothes. I am keeping her in sequins to bejewel "WALK" on her colorful tank tops.

I'm glad she can't see through the television screen. She would be appalled at my less-than-fashionable clothing selections and less-than-perfect workout hair.

Sometimes it's just Leslie and me. But more often than not, she also has other people in her studio.

I have been known to talk to the people in the video. See, I do have companionship when I exercise, if only in my head. There's Nicki, who needs to turn the smile down a notch. I'm all for being pleasant, but nobody can be that perky all of the time.

Then there's Audra who wears a midriff-baring workout bra to show off her perfectly toned abs and arms. I would just like to tell Leslie and Audra that I know Audra didn't get those muscles by simply using the "walk away weighted balls," the walk belt" or the "punch up your walk weighted gloves." It's false advertising if you ask me.

I wasn't born yesterday, Leslie (or I wouldn't be a woman of a certain age, you know)!

For Mother's Day 2009, Jill bought me a couple of "The Biggest Loser" boot camp workout tapes. I seriously think she was trying to kill me.

After attempting those tapes for awhile, I felt like a loser all right - and I don't mean in a good way. My doctor said maybe I should try something else.

I tried a couple of other low-dollar DVDs. They required too many dance moves, sending me back to my nightmarish K-State Singers audition.

So, it's just me and Leslie again. My most recent purchase was the 5-Mile Fat Burning Walk. It incorporates some interval training, which is supposed to pump up the workout.

I also had been wearing some wrist weights in an effort to provide a little more resistance. But recently I noticed some "sparkles" on the basement floor. Since I no longer have young "artists" doing craft projects around here, I was baffled.

Then I noticed my wrist weights had sprung a leak. I guess it is evidence that my workout equipment doesn't just sit around: It gets used.

So far, I haven't found any weights like them. And I think I may have to invest in a magnet, too. Those little metal "bullets" are hard to sweep up.

Maybe I should email Leslie and see if she could find me some. You know, we are best workout buddies.